Facing Fears — My Journey to Overcoming Self-Doubt
The other day, I got a text message from a friend:
“Hey Becky! I know this is kind of late notice, but tomorrow night we are having a bring-a-friend workout night at Tae Kwon Do and I was wondering if you’d like to come!”
Did I mention she’s a black belt?
As I read it, embarrassing moments throughout my life flooded my mind.
In 6th grade, helping my best friend deliver newspapers and having high school boys heckling and yelling, “Run, fat girl, run!” as I tried to hurriedly cross the street.
In middle school PE, being the last one to finish every mile run and every speed test we had.
In high school tennis practice, when I was the last one (by far) in the conditioning drills and having the middle aged coach stay back to run alongside me.
Just last summer on our mission trip when I didn’t have the arm strength to pull myself up onto a ledge to pose for a picture.
Everything inside me screamed, “You can’t do a Tae Kwon Do workout! You’ll make a fool of yourself!”
And then something crazy happened. I responded with:
“Absolutely! That sounds like so much fun!”
Because I’ve missed out. I’ve let that fear dictate my decisions for me for far too long.
I drove to the place with white knuckles and sweaty palms. Logically, I knew this was not that big a deal, but convincing myself to truly believe that was an uphill battle.
Karenina met me at the front door with a huge smile and a hug, telling me how excited she was that I was there and immediately about 60% of my fear melted away.
(Words of affirmation, people. I’m telling you, use ’em. They work.)
She introduced me to people, I quickly discovered that the other guests were just as nervous as I was, and the session began.
We spent the next hour and a half doing lunges (oh, so many lunges!), squats, knee jumps, jump roping, chariot runs, kicks, lunge-kicks, weighted punches and more…
and it. was. awesome.
Karenina was a fantastic coach and I had a blast with her. She is probably the nicest black belt out there. Just sayin’.
And the words I heard last night from the instructor and Karenina? They’re sticking with me.
Don’t stop kicking! Those kicks are fantastic!
A glutton for punishment, huh? I hope to see you back for training!
Wow, you’re a quick learner!
Whoa, you run fast!
By the time I left, I was tired, sweaty…and on top of the world.
I pushed myself, both physically and mentally, but most importantly, I faced my fears.
And I won.
Becky, great thoughts. I enjoy reading about your experience. Alysan
Alysan, you are so wonderful. Thank you for reading. It really means a lot to me!
It really was fun! And thank you! Believe me, I was definitely overweight…big time! Ha!
That sounds like so much fun! That’s so great that you faced your fear! I’ve been following you on Instagram for a while now, and you look great! It’s hard to believe you were ever overweight! By the way, your nervous face is so cute! 🙂
Rachel, that verse was going through my head all night! I’m so glad my story could be an encouragement to you. It feels fantastic to defeat some of those feelings that hold you back!
Dearest Claire, thank you so much for your sweet words. I wish I could reach out and hug you right now! Love you bunches!
Sabum Marie, I can’t even tell you how much it means to me that you came over here and read my post! You really did a fantastic job catering the workout to meet every participant at their individual level. I don’t know how you did it, but it was a complete success! You made me feel so welcome and I had a great time! Thank you for the wonderful experience!
Way to go Becky! Thanks so much for sharing this story it is an encouragement to me, I’ve never been athletic.
“Kind words are like honey, sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.” Prov 16:24 Have a great day! 🙂
Becks,
I am so super proud of you. You are a beautiful and brave woman who can do absolutely anything. So proud of your fearlessness!
Love you,
Claire
Becky – Thank you so much for joining us last night. You did great and it was a pleasure to have you in class. I love that you overcame your fears and stretched out of your comfort zone. What you posted on your blog was amazing and exactly what I had hoped the experience would be like for our guests. Thank you for sharing the experience – and I hope that you consider coming and training. It’s great cross training for running (and for life).
And you’re right – Karenina is a wonderful coach and an extremely kind (and exceptional) black belt.