10 Prayers For An Emotionally Abusive Marriage
Use these prayers for an emotionally abusive marriage, written by a wife who sought God’s help in the midst of her husband’s affairs and verbal abuse.
**I am not a counselor, pastor, psychiatrist, or professional. I am just someone who experienced an emotionally abusive marriage and prayed my heart out for years. These prayers are some of the very ones I prayed when I was in an emotionally abusive marriage myself.
They are heartfelt and authentic but should not be considered to be advice on your particular situation. I cannot recommend either divorce or staying together in your unique circumstance but, as in any situation involving physical violence, please seek professional help to keep you and your family safe.***
If you came across this post, the likelihood is that you are in an emotionally abusive marriage.
First of all, I am just so very sorry. You have probably heard words that never should have been spoken but still cut like a knife.
I want to be very clear in saying that emotional or verbal abuse is still abuse.
I wholeheartedly believe that lines up with God’s Word (my Christian counselor agreed).
You may have heard otherwise. Verbal and emotional abuse tend to be minimized.
But it was very real to me.
There were nights I begged my ex-husband to hit me instead of abusing me with his words.
When I reported him to the police at the advice of my lawyer after a particularly angry fit of rage, the policeman just stared and asked, “So…he never hit you then?” As if physical abuse would have been the only indicator of a problem worth addressing.
It’s not.
Verbal and emotional abuse are real and very destructive. If you are unsure if you are in an abusive relationship, please look over this article by Healthline which lays out 64 signs of mental and emotional abuse.
It took me years to even recognize that what I was experiencing was abuse so I didn’t even know I needed to be getting professional help for most of those years.
But I prayed. I prayed so hard.
I have a box of tear-stained journals full of prayers because, even when I didn’t know I needed a counselor, I knew I needed God’s help.
I prayed all of the prayers below but there were also many times when I felt so broken that my prayers simply consisted of saying, “Jesus…Jesus…I need You.”
Whatever prayers you can muster…God hears.
The prayers below are written from my perspective as a wife with an emotionally abusive husband but if you are the husband of an emotionally abusive wife, please just switch out the pronouns to fit your situation.
Do the same thing if you are a loving friend or family member praying for the victims of emotional abuse in need.
Prayers & Bible Verses For Emotional Abuse & Verbal Abuse
1. For Healing The Broken Relationship
Abba Father,
Please heal my marriage.
I’m desperate for help and can’t see any solution during this time of need. I know that, as it is right now, it’s very broken and feels like it’s beyond repair. Hopeless. His words have hurt me in ways I never thought possible.
My heart is raw and I feel like I don’t have any fight left in me. Our years of marriage is full of fear, bitterness, resentment, despair, and so many other things that do not glorify You.
I’m at the end of my rope. But You are our Almighty Healer and I believe that You can do a miracle in my marriage.
Heal his heart of past hurts. Proverbs 12:18 says that the words of the reckless pierce like swords (which is exactly how his words have felt to me), but also that the tongue of the wise brings healing.
Help me to be a healing voice in my marriage. Show me where to reach out for help. Surround me and my husband with supportive people who will help us both work through our problems and experience true healing.
This has to come from You, Father. I lift my marriage up to You and ask that You give us complete healing so that we can use their relationship to show the world glimpses of Your love. I’m asking for a miracle and You are the only One who can deliver.
Despite these mixed-up feelings, I’m making the first step today to believe in the power of prayer all over again. Sometimes, I hold back because it might seem like a long story, but then I remember that You genuinely care about every detail of my life and put my tears in a bottle.
Lord, revive my prayer life. As I get uplifted by Your love, I yearn to draw closer to You and experience the grace of life in unexpected moments of connection.
In Jesus’ Almighty Name, I pray. Amen.
Read more prayers for marriage reconciliation here.
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.
Proverbs 12:18
2. For Healthy Boundaries In The Marriage For Both Husband & Wife
Almighty God,
I am in a toxic relationship. And, somehow, here You are, reassuring me that I’m not alone, as You always do.
I know You are just. You are a God who fights for the abused and stands up for the oppressed. I ask that You do just that in my marriage, but I also ask that You empower me to fight for myself as well.
I feel so small right now…so beaten down.
Give me the confidence that can only come from You to say no when it is appropriate, and empower me to intentionally choose to do the right things. Give me the strength to lay down healthy, loving boundaries and stick to them.
Dear Father, grant me wisdom in showing me when I should stand firm, when I should stay silent, when to be flexible, when to leave, and how to get help.
I don’t want to be selfish. I want to honor You. But giving in to his every whim is NOT honoring You and it needs to stop.
I don’t feel like I have the strength to stand up against him so I’m depending on You to hold me up in my weakness. Boundaries might be the best way I can love my husband right now.
Please, show me how to gently but firmly lay them as a loving wife.
In Your Son‘s Name, I pray. Amen.
A hot-tempered person must pay the penalty;
rescue them, and you will have to do it again.
Proverbs 19:19
Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.
John 3:20-21
3. For An Abusive Husband’s Heart
Dear God,
I know my husband’s heart is not right with You. Even he knows his heart isn’t right with you.
I’ve tried so hard to be patient and loving and kind to show him Your unconditional love through my words and actions, but it isn’t good enough, Lord. I’m no substitute for You.
Please, heal his heart. I don’t know what past hurts he is harboring but I know they are causing him to lash out at me unprovoked. I know he does everything he can to distance himself from experiencing any hurt in any relationship.
Instead, he chooses easy relationships and ditches people when it gets hard. He distances himself from any real connection.
I don’t even know if he is capable of authentic relationships anymore. He is selfish, wanting to experience the benefits of a marriage without any responsibility, any commitment, and any work.
And when something doesn’t go his way, he responds in the most hurtful ways he can think of. His abusive behavior is pure evil.
But You, my powerful God, are bigger. You can shine Your light in the darkness of his heart. You can expose his sin and heal the darkest places that he doesn’t even want You to know about.
Soften his hardened heart with Your unconditional love. And in Your mercy, deliver him from any strongholds and evil spirit, setting him free to embrace Your grace.
Bring him to his knees and show him how desperately he needs You. Because You are the only one that can help him and heal him.
In Jesus’ Name I pray, amen.
For this people’s heart has become calloused;
they hardly hear with their ears,
and they have closed their eyes.
Otherwise they might see with their eyes,
hear with their ears,
understand with their hearts
and turn, and I would heal them.
Matthew 13:15
4. For The Abused Wife’s Heart
Gracious Lord,
My heart is so broken right now. I never imagined words could destroy a soul but, even though the hand of my spouse never physically harmed me, I feel emotionally bruised and battered. My heart is raw after feeling beaten up again and again.
I’ve been yelled at, cursed at, belittled, insulted, threatened, blamed for his actions, and my emotions have been mocked and invalidated time and time again.
These are all painful memories and I can’t bear this emotional pain any longer. I need You, Lord. I desperately need You. Please, heal my heart. Holy Spirit, I need Your healing touch.
O Lord, You are my only hope. He never owns up to his actions or says sorry, which makes the healing process harder without him being part of it. I refuse to sink to his level. I refuse to be defeated by his sin. But I’m honestly drowning, God.
I’m barely hanging on and I need You to lift me up on Your wings like eagles. I lift my heart up completely to You in full surrender. I am Yours, God. Please, let your strength shine through my weakness. Get me through another day. Protect me from his attacks. Heal my hurting heart.
Help me remember my true identity: a child of God. Hold me close in Your comforting arms and everlasting love!
In Your Son’s precious Name, I pray. Amen.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Psalm 34:18
5. For Help & Support
God,
I desperately need help. I am so isolated in this marriage. I’ve been trying so hard to respect and honor my husband by not telling people about all that goes on in our house behind closed doors but, in the process, I’ve completely isolated myself.
Just thinking about making phone calls for help freaks me out, and I’m trembling in fear! It’s been like this for a long time.
Nobody understands what I’m going through because they just don’t know about most of it. Please, show me who I can reach out to for help.
Direct me to the right support groups, professional counselors, church leaders, or even family members filled with Your Word to help end this cycle of abuse in a safe way. Give me wisdom in how to speak respectfully but also truthfully about our marriage.
I can’t do this alone anymore.
Bring people into my life who will understand and support me and continue to point me back to You, not just suggest easy answers that will only be bandaid solutions for a bullet-hole-wound-problem.
Proverbs 12:26 tells us to choose friends carefully and I feel that’s especially true now. I want to do this right, Lord, honoring You every step of the way.
I know You are my ever-present support but will You please bring a small circle of people in my life to surround me with support and much prayer, too? I believe You created us to thrive in community and I really need that right now.
I love You, Lord. In Jesus’ Name, I pray. Amen.
The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.
Proverbs 12:26
6. For Protection From Verbal Abuse
Dear Heavenly Father,
I cry out to You today begging for Your protection. I’m not safe in this marriage. He hasn’t laid a hand on me but he has destroyed me with his words, his threats, and his anger.
I shake with fear when he starts yelling. I cower when he starts throwing things. My teeth chatter, even hours after the screaming stops.
I’m terrified to be in my own home when he is there. I don’t feel safe anywhere. His anger is unpredictable and there is nothing I can do to stop it. I’m asking for Your almighty protection, Lord, from verbal abusers like my husband.
I believe that You have a mighty convicting work to do and only Your unfailing love can change him. In Exodus, Your Word says, “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”
Please, fight for me. I choose to dwell in You, my refuge. I love You and I trust You.
In Your Name I pray, amen.
The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”
Exodus 14:14
Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
Psalm 91:1-2
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”
Read more prayers for protection in an abusive situation from Psalm 91 here.
7. For A Way Out Of The Abuse
Almighty Father,
You are my only safe space. I can’t do this anymore. I have been walking in this darkness for years now.
His actions have hurt me beyond words. I need not only a way out, but Your hedge of protection. I’m here, pleading for your help. Surround me, Lord, with Your angels, to guard me against abuse.
I never thought divorce would be an option for me. I know You hate divorce. But you also hate violence against your people and abusive homes. I’ve never taken that verse in Malachi as a whole before, only in separate parts. I hate divorce, too. But is that where you are leading me?
I don’t see any other answers. I’ve fought so hard for my marriage but he’s not fighting. He’s destroying. He’s abusing. He’s unfaithful. I will continue to fight if you tell me to. But I don’t have any more to give.
I’m at the end of my rope. My heart can’t take this psychological abuse anymore. Honoring You is my number one goal but I don’t believe You want me continuing to live like this. This is not your will for my life or for my marriage.
Will You please give me wisdom and lead me to the right solution, Lord? Is it separation? Divorce? Something else I haven’t considered? Please, show me the answer clearly. I need to know my next steps are led by You. I can’t make this decision on my own.
In Your Name I pray, amen.
“For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with violence,” says the Lord of armies. “So be careful about your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously.”
Malachi 2:16
**If you are thinking about divorce, please seek help and counsel from a pastor, Christian counselor, or other trained professional. It is not a decision to make lightly and you might need extra help to plan a safe escape.
8. For Peace That Surpasses Understanding
Dear Lord Jesus,
You’re a Good Father who sees every little thing in my life. Yes, you’re the God who sees me.
I ask that You cover my marriage with Your peace that surpasses all understanding. Emotional abuse in a marriage is an incredibly stressful thing to experience.
My heart is raw from the words he throws at me like daggers. I’m grieving the marriage I thought I was signing up for.
I’m frustrated and distraught that he has no response to my heartache. It seems like the more pain I’m experiencing, the more cold, angry, and hurtful he becomes. This is the man I fell in love with and I can’t feel an ounce of concern that he has for me anymore.
But Your righteous right hand and peace can cover all of this and more, Lord.
Let it wash over every fear, every doubt, and every frustration that I have and overflow into my life and my heart. While he is fighting to destroy, You give life. Where he creates conflict, You offer peace. Where he is fighting to divide us, You bring unity. Cover me with Your peace.
It would make no sense for me to feel at peace right now but that’s exactly how your peace works – without boundaries and without me needing to understand. I need You, Lord.
In Your Son’s Name, I pray. Amen.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:7
9. For A Husband To End An Affair
Lord Jesus Christ,
I need Your help. My husband is having an affair with another woman. Every time he gets caught, he gets so angry and blames me for his actions.
He tells me I’m not loving enough, I’m not meeting his needs, I’m not making him happy…I thought those things were true for so long – that if I was just a better wife, he wouldn’t look for another woman.
But I know that’s a lie now. I know that, no matter how perfect I was, I would never be able to satisfy him. He is the one choosing to live in sin and that is not my burden to bear. His satisfaction in our marriage has to come from You changing his heart, Lord.
Finding out that my husband cheated on me is the hardest thing to bear. But you know what, God? I’m grateful because You’re here, helping me get through it all.
There will always be a woman out there who is prettier and more exciting than I am. Please, transform his heart. Give him a heart to be faithful to me, to our marriage. Let him feel the weight of him breaking the covenant he made in our marriage. Convict his heart and bring him back to me – not just physically, but emotionally, as well.
You can heal all things but he has to want to make our marriage work, Lord. And that has to be from You. I’ve tried to win him over in my words and actions but I’m not powerful enough.
It’s a miracle only You can do and I believe You can. Please, end his affair. Show the other woman that what she is doing is wrong, too. Fight for my marriage with me.
In the Name of Jesus, I pray, amen.
Click here for more prayers for a cheating husband.
One who commits adultery with a woman is lacking sense; He who would destroy himself commits it.
Proverbs 6:32
For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, acts of adultery, other immoral sexual acts, thefts, false testimonies, and slanderous statements.
Matthew 15:19
10. For The Abused Wife’s Self-Confidence
Merciful God,
My husband’s words have ripped my self-confidence to shreds. He has insulted my appearance, my intelligence, my relationships, my work, and more.
I feel like all that’s left is the shell of the person that I used to be. Even when I’ve tried to cling to the words that You use to define me, his voice still creeps in. It wears me down.
It’s exhausting. Please, Lord, rebuild my confidence to be built on You and You alone. Not on my appearance, my intelligence, my relationships, my work, or anyone else’s opinion of me. You made me on purpose and for a purpose. Please, show me what that is.
Help me to not only know that I am worthy because I am a daughter of the King but also to feel that Truth. My husband can’t destroy my confidence if it depends on You alone.
Help me to work toward believing that’s true. I’ve felt like such a failure as a woman and as a wife but I have worked so hard to please him and You. I’m so thankful that You see my heart.
None of my efforts have gone unnoticed in Your eyes, even if all of them have been left unappreciated in our home. Thank You for being my rock. I love You, I trust You, and I rely on You to be the source of my confidence.
It’s a relief to know that the love of God is the only thing that never changes! No matter how hard my circumstances may be right now, help me center my thoughts on the new life you’ve blessed me with—a life overflowing with peace, joy, abundance, and countless blessings—rather than dwelling on emotional wounds.
In Jesus’ Name, I pray, amen.
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
Psalm 139:13-14
but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
Isaiah 40:31
See this article for more Bible verses on self-confidence.
Thank you so much. This is my life right now and these prayers I know will be helpful. Not really sure where else to turn, but prayer. It’s very comforting to know I’m not alone
You are not alone…and I hate that this is your life right now.
Lord, please fight for Tiffany. Allow her to experience your Psalm 91 protection and safety. Guide her words and actions and provide her shelter in the shadow of Your wings. In Your Son’s Mighty name I pray, amen.
Wow thank you so much for these. It’s like they were written just for me. I’m printing them out for when I have no words. I’m desperately seeking God in this time because it has to stop. Whether God works a miracle or I divorce. I’m fine with either at this point. Either way I’m praying for this trauma bond to be broken because it’s not of God. And whether the relationship goes with it is up to my husband. But I desire a marriage built on God and real love. Trauma bond isn’t real love and isn’t Godly so it has to go. The process is so painful it’s hard to put into words but I feel moments of clarity and strength I haven’t felt since before my marriage. I am excited for the time when majority of my life is spent in clarity vs confusion and strength vs brokenness and joy vs despair. I’m mourning and grieving this marriage while I’m in it and I hope that helps for when I get on the other side so it’s not so painful. Either way, thanks for listening and thanks for letting God use you. I pray for a success story and testimony at the end of this and for God to use me to bless and help heal other abused women ❤️
Help I am sick poor & my husband is abusive – he has control of all – he lies in the legalistic distortion manner. I know God is sovereign but I am alone. Pittsburgh is a cruel place & enjoy others misery & excess of all forms along with corruption even in the churches & women’s shelters.
By His grace- Sue
I never thought I would be on a website like this almost reading the same or similar prayers I have said or prayed in my heart so many times qnd I am in tears wondering if leaving is what God intends and if so how without losing my kids to him.
Oh, Jess, I am so terribly sorry you’ve been put in this position. You shouldn’t have to choose to stay in your marriage OR to be treated with respect. May God bless you and keep you and your children safe as you lean into Him for guidance, wisdom, protection, and provision every step you take, no matter what direction you go.
My husband actually apologized this morning for his mean words last night. God is so awesome, he led me to your prayers. Thank You 🙏
Praise God! That’s wonderful, Margaret!
My husband of 25 years doesn’t like to talk to me. He says he feels trapped. He doesn’t even want to celebrate/plan our Silver Anniversary. He gets very annoyed at me and yells at me in front of our 21, 19, and 16 year old kids. It is getting worse and it is never over anything important. It is never even arguments- All stupid stuff and I can’t predict. It is like Dr Jekyl and Mr Hyde. Sometimes he just wakes up mean. I actually feel sorry for him at times. We are a practicing Catholic family. Thank you for these beautiful prayers. I don’t know how much more I can take- it is starting to affect my health. God Bless
I am so very sorry for all you’ve gone through in your marriage. That unpredictability creates such an unstable environment. I’m praying God gives you wisdom and guides your next steps. <3
My sister-in-law my sister and other people are blaming me for being running around with my customers and other people because they’re they’re running around with them and accusing me and their wives are thinking I’m running around with their husbands which is nothing but a lie will you please pray for this for my business
I read this prayer timing by and I have been crying….sometimes it feels like I am at my end! I have given up so many times! And I don’t think people take verbal abuse seriously as much as physical abuse but we all become shadow of ourselves! I am happy to know I am not alone and I am happy to know it can be fixed! Thank you for this post! God bless every encouragement to women like me! I am open to more advice that are not divorce
Thank you for these prayers.
I am a husband who has grieved the actions and words of my wife over the past 2 years of our marriage. She hid an alcohol addiction in dating and it came out in marriage. She has spiritually threatened and manipulated me so much that I have had to wrestle with God daily to believe that he loves me anymore. She has also been unfaithful to me but refuses to confess. The continued lying throughout the entire relationship, despite tears and apologies, has worn me down to the ground and made me into a man who is hurt, fearful and untrusting. She also claims to be a Christian and has used this to pressure me into staying. I love her dearly and have struggled hard to know what to do, but have recently come to the decision to file for divorce due to the repeated emotional and spiritual abuse as well as the lies.
Please pray for my wife even now. Our divorce will be finalised in 3 weeks time. Her name is Des. I am still open to God performing a miracle in changing her heart from stone to flesh, but I fear she is too self deceived at this stage. I have faith that God can save anyone he wants, and indeed does in his timing; for he saved me when I was in the flesh.
Please also pray that I would not let my identify be shaped by my relationship status with anyone but the Lord Jesus.
In Christ;
Rob
Rob, I am so very sorry to hear all of this.
God, it is so clear that Rob loves You and wants to honor You in his life. Will You please guide his every footstep, keeping his feet safely on Your path? Give him wisdom and peace here and surround him with supportive people who will pray for him, encourage him, and hold him up during this very difficult season. Be near to his broken heart and comfort him in ways only You can. In Jesus’ name, amen.
I want to Foster a child and make her mine😍🎁🎁🎁🎁🎂
Thank you so much for these prayers I am at the end of my rope I am with someone who always has a negative outlook on life, is never wrong about anything always tries to start a verbal fight over any thing. You go out of your way to may sure they are pleased but they are never satisfied. When the are driving on the road they are blowing their car horn rushing people along, driving recklessly around people if they are driving to slow in front of them. Everytime I’m in the car with them I am on the edge of my seat praying they aren’t involved in an accident. They always have this woe is me attitude about life. Everything could be going great and they still find something to complain about. I feel so verbally beaten down at times I have contemplated ending my life. Thank you so much for these heartfelt prayers . You just don’t know how many you ve helped with them.
I am so so glad these prayers could encourage you, Nicole. <3 Everything you've described here is so hard and I'm so thankful you chose not to end your life. May God give you peace, comfort, and guidance in these incredibly difficult days.
So sorry Dawn. This man has a character problem needs counselling and the law. No assault should go unreported.
I have been married for 15 years to a narcissistic and now alcoholic severely verbally abusive and controlling husband. I am a strong independent woman but this man has damaged and broken me beyond my own comprehension.
My husband and I dated for almost a year some 37 years ago but afterwards went our own separate ways and married other people. When we married 15 years ago we were both faithfully in church and I was a Sunday School teacher and sang in the church choir. We had three boys between us when we married, two his and one mine. Twelve years ago his 16-year-old took his own life and his drinking spiraled out of control. I tried to be as supportive as I knew how and begged him to let us get counseling. He refused the counseling and began self medicating with alcohol. Three years later I lost my only son (28-years-old) to pulmonary embolisms (blood clots in the lungs). By this point, he had emotionally checked out and I felt like an island trying to navigate my incomprehensible grief. I did not take any depression or anxiety medication which was offered to me on multiple occasions by my physician because I did not want to mask any of the stages of grief I knew I would have to endure.
Because my husband is a narcissist and empathizes with no one and because of his own anger about who he has become and also because of his addiction, all of that anger, disappointment and grief, is lashed out onto me. I am his verbal punching bag. He has an identical twin brother who has an obsession with me (more like a quest as he has an unnatural jealousy of my husband). His brother lied to my husband and told him we had had a sexual affair many years ago. I confronted his brother in front of my husband and his brother denied having said it and denied any sexual affair. I’m not sure if his brother lied to me or if my husband conjured this lie up as another means of manipulation. However, every time my husband drinks out of control which is 3, 4, or 5 times a week, this lie is thrown into my face. My husband calls me the most awful names, curses me, belittles me, threatens me, and has vowed to destroy me, my testimony, my witness and my reputation. He has told me many times he wants to see me homeless and destitute. He wants to punish me and steal my joy any way possible. If the TV is too loud he will come into the living room, unplug the TV and take the remote from me. He threatens to have the power cut off if I turn up the heat or the air conditioning. He threatens to cancel my medical insurance which is provided through his corporate job but I do pay my husband for my medical insurance and for half of all of the bills. He threatens to tell my work colleagues that I am a whore, a liar, a cheater and a thief. If I show a home that has too much air freshener in it, if I use a different soap to wash my hands or a different fragranced hand sanitizer or if I change hairsprays, I am being accused of smelling like a man’s cologne and of cheating.
I cannot trust this man with my emotions, my money, my security, my safety or my life. He is not of sound mind anymore. I pray that the alcohol has only altered his mind and not that he has sold his soul out to Satan because he is pure evil. When I try to escape to another room from his unrelenting verbal blows that include cursing me, cursing my deceased son, cursing my deceased Mom of only 1-1/2 years, cursing every member of my family, and even spitting on me (anything to hurt me to my core) he will remove the door knob and/or the door so I have no means of escaping the torment.
I walk on eggshells, try not to make too much noise, cook his favorite meals, keep the house just so, keep up my appearance, excel at work and be kind, but it’s not enough………it’s never enough. I stay in a constant upheaval trying to please him.
Our physical relationship has taken a toll as well, if you can imagine. I am not withholding, but how can I be with this man who tears out my heart multiple times a week? He has propositioned my daughter-in-law for sex as well as several others who have reached out to me privately to let me know they refused his perverted advances and to offer their sympathy.
I pray for him, myself, my reactions, and our marriage multiple times daily and have done so for years. I am so broken and stay in a constant fight or flight mode that I have now developed a tremor in my hands. I am jumpy and now have brain fog and memory issues. At this point I am praying for God to harden my heart towards him and to stop feeling so responsible for him so I will feel the liberty to leave him. However, if I leave him I fear he will spiral to his death. Please help me pray for strength and guidance.
Help, I’ve become someone I despise and my husband despises and have begged God to help. I can relate to each prayer and comment. I’m aware that two wrongs don’t make a right. I’ve been so damaged mentally and emotionally from lack of love and respect that I’ve become my husband in many ways and he’s become more of what he was attracted to in me reminding me often that I was “positive’ lovable and now I’m negative and toxic, clingy and harmful to him. He’s right I am. I have such severe PTSD and abandonment issues that I struggle daily to understand how this happened. My husband is getting all that he wants separated yet still in control over me the “messed up undeserving wife'” that is a burden to him.
Joy, I am so sorry for what you’re going through right now. Of course, the damaging experiences you’ve been through have left their mark! Don’t stop begging God for help. I absolutely believe that He will answer your prayer.
Lord, please help Joy break out of this place she feels stuck in. Show her that her core identity is in You and that cannot be shaken. Show her her next best step here and draw her even closer to You, proving to her that You will never abandon her. In Jesus’ Name, amen.
I am going through the same. My husband is unfaithful, getting involved with other women. He verbal, emotional and financial abuse me.. He isolates me from the world. His only desire is to control my very existence till the end of time. The only reason why he does not physically abuse me its because I called the cops on him a while back when he hit me while holding our baby in my hand. I know he wants to hit me but he know he can’t so he use different abusive methods.
I love God I trust God and I know for a fact he hates the way this man treats me. This is his 2nd marriage and I didn’t know the details of the 1st marriage until after we got married. He did all the same to his ex wife. He is who he is. He has no desire to change. God took him to near death. His heart even stop beating for a few seconds. He promised to commit his life to God but he has gone back being the same person he was. I pray to God.. I didn’t see a way out but being the way maker that he is, as always he showed me a way out. I see the door, I am heading towards it and I trust if he show me a door he will take me to it and he will take me thought it
I refuse to pray for this marriage to heal. I refuse to even pray for him. My only prayer to God is to let him experience 10 times the pain and shame he has caused me
God is a just God
He will judge. He hates violence, he hates husbands who dishonor their vows and vengeance is his. I cut my losses and will be moving on. This man only goal is to destroy me emotionally. He even as far as call child services and told them I am loosing my mind. But God being the defender of the weak showed the police and child services the conniving liar that he is. Instead these people saw my pain and provided a helping hand. They brought me to a hospital and i spent 2 nights on the psychiatric floor being treated for exhaustion caused by this exhausting relationship. HOW GREAT IS OUR GOD. If he got his way I would be on jail and he would have custody of our children. This man is the perfect example of pure evil. He do all of this to me because me know I was planning on leaving him and it drove him crazy knowing that I am done with his abuse. But whatever is in the dark God will bring it to light. I pray God put him upon a pedestal for the whole word to see. Bring shame and disgrace to his life and to bring him down just as he has brought down others. I forgive him but I will never forget.
Thank you for your prayer book. I pray the onces I see best suit my needs. And I pray for all women and even men who is going through abuse at the hands of their spouse that God will step in and resolve the problem. Some people are better left alone. Im not worried that God hates divorce because one thing I know for sure is that it is not his will for me to allow any man to destroy my mental state. If the right hand offends you cut it off.
Deat At may the Lord grand you your requests. You are a great woman with a testimony
As I’m writing this, I’m in tears. Today, we got back from a late night church service, and tonight like many nights, his verbal attacks started because of a small disagreement. We’ve been married 7 years and have 2 little boys. No matter what I do, he criticizes, belittles, complains, controls, gaslights, insults, even assaults at times. I have tried to be a good wife and mother, but to him, I can never do it good enough. He doesn’t help me, when he does, it’s with an indignant attitude. He complains about how I take care of the kids, but only I feed them, give them medicine, teach them, and go to their appointments. He is violent and verbally abusive in front of them to me. He has thrown things, ripped things, cussed, and swore and called me every name in the book. But tonight, because we had a tiny disagreement on how to talk to our son, he said, I have destroyed so much.
People in church see him as a wonderful doting husband and father. He can be at times. But any little thing can trigger him. I’m afraid of him. I pray all the time for God to protect my boys and I. How can someone pray and worship God, but curse and insult their wife 5 minutes later? I want out of this. I’m truly scared and don’t want these boys to witness their mom being abused anymore. I’m just afraid of what he might do if I try to leave.
@Dawn, feels like we’re in the same boat…. I’m so tired I could scream and go mad!! My husband makes me sooooooooo extremely angry, he criticizes my daily from morning to night, yells at me,breaks me down,rebukes me, belittles me, finds fault with everything I do etc etc every single day!! He would flip over nothing and then start praying and rebuking me and calling me demonic and what not…
He has been labeled as a narcissist by a spiritual leader whom I really trust, and yes I get it, narcissism is an illness and that is how he will react then, but I’m so terribly exhausted 😩
I’ve been praying and calling out to God and begging and pleading Him for help over and over and over, crying out every day, that Abba would help my husband and also help me to love him like Jesus does….
We have a 9month old and 2 and a half year old and I’m terrified for them! They are the only reason I’m staying,because he is a great father, but a terrible husband. But also the way he yells at me and breaks me down in front of the children breaks my heart. My daughter (2 and a half) now sometimes also points her fingers in my face and shouts at me and refuses to do what I tell her,but she sees it from her father, he doesn’t respect me so why should she….. She also has a lot of tantrums,but I think it’s because of all the terrifying emotions she might be having caused by the constant strive and horrible atmosphere in the house….
There was a time I was contemplating 2 options, suicide or divorce, but neither would help the situation….
At the moment I’m just begging God to protect our children!! Only He can do that… I’m so tired and heartbroken and struggling to hear God’s heart on what to do…. I feel hopeless😔 😔
I’ve been married for 3 years to a very verbally abusive. We have a 2 year old and a baby on the way. My Husband is a wonderful provider and an excellent father. When he’s off from work he’s does the cooking cleaning etc. The thing is he’s a lying cheating narcissist. He belittles me threatens to leave and always telling me I’ll never find another man. He also has to reminds me how he can get any woman he wants. He tells me I’m nosey and if I stop searching I wouldn’t find out anything. Every time I confront him about a different woman it stops for about 2 weeks. After that he goes right back to the same women. I’m hurt just had 2 miscarriages pregnant again and he just won’t stop. I pray all the time but it only gets worse. He tells me I love you I’m sorry I’ll never leave my family. But he continues to hurt me. I keep asking God what should I do. I’m confused lost hurt I just want out. He will never stop seeing these other women.
I have been in a toxic marriage for the past 18 years. Before I married, I was full of life and joy and my relationship with the Lord was so strong.
My husband and I dated a year before we married. We were both born again Christian’s. He was my best friend and had all the qualities in a mate I’d been looking for.
6 months before we married my dad, my biggest supporter and the only believer in my family died suddenly of a heart attack.
I should have never married on the heals of that traumatic event. But I was devastated and my world shaken, so I clung to my future husband like a life preserver believing he was strong enough to carry me when my world got turned upside down.
I had no idea how grief would affect me or my marriage and being in the throes of it left me incredibly vulnerable and open to the chaos and destruction that my husband had been hiding during our courtship.
The criticism, intimidation, blame
shifting, and gaslighting was relentless.
We moved away from a career I loved and family and friends to pursue his career.
I became isolated and my health tanked.
Over the years there has been multiple emotional affairs, porn and a physical affair. We’ve since had a daughter who is eight now. And my health is at its worst.
I no longer can work and am home all the time homeschooling my daughter. My husband finds all of his self worth in identity in his career and in his relationship with our daughter. There is no need for me minus the conveniences of marriage that he expects.
I feel trapped because my daughters self worth is so wrapped up in him. She depends on him for her happiness and he thrives off that. I have tried for so long to set boundaries and shield her from his smothering but it’s impossible.
We’ve been to so many counselors and I’ve reached out time and time again to churches and other couples but it never helps. I end up taking the bait and get really defensive and upset at the things he will say while he sits there calm and collected. All the focus stays on me and he uses that to beat me down further when we are at home. No matter how I try to explain my concerns over the inappropriate relationship he has with our daughter, it gets lost and he can explain it away and nobody truly understands the extent of it.
I believe he cares about me but do to his ability to twist the truth and his warped reality he views things through , he’s very comfortable seeing me as the problem and himself as the devoted sacrificial husband and father.
He’s never been called out for his part in the breakdown nor held accountable for any of his actions.
So as of now I am completely dependent on him financially, my health is a mess which leaves me feeling completely depleted mentally and physically. All my strength goes into homeschooling and caring for my daughter and taking care of all household responsibilities including bills, finances, vehicles, repairs, house maintenance. It’s all left on me.
I’ve prayed for so long and believe God can heal and restore our marriage but don’t know if He will. And in the meantime, I am waisting away to nothing.
How is that Gods plan for my life ? How does me staying in this marriage and it continuing on like this glorify Him?
If I’m to leave, then how do I do this when I’m completely dependent financially on this marriage. My daughter is so enmeshed with my husband it would take so much strength to disrupt that. I truly feel stuck and I can’t hear God’s voice or direction anymore…..
So sorry Jessy for what has happened to you and child. It seems the first step is to let your daughter go to school, out of the house and prepare for an independent life. You need the break also. Surrender all concerns to God and work on your health. This by diet and exercises, join gym also and other women’s activities at church. You could- get a suitable job because your work load is already 10 jobs in one. From there you could hire a helper. With this he is not at the centre of your attention. May the Lord give you strength
Thank you for sharing these prayers. They are just what I need to express. I, too, have suffered emotional abuse from a man who is in ministry. It’s too heavy to share as sometimes as I think about all the crap that I have endured for 30 some years. I need to end it and have plans to leave. I’ve been called disgusting names, yelled at over things that don’t merit his explosive behavior, accused of infidelity, criticized and just mistreated just because. I asked him why he seeks to keep confusion brewing in his own home when it should be a place of peace, his response was ‘because I can.’ He portrays himself as a minister on the pulpit but he is an angry wolf behind closed doors. I have many ugly stories to tell as I know that many of you have stories, too. To drudge them up makes my heart ache. I don’t know what awful experience he had as a child but he seems to be carrying a lot of bitterness, anger and hatred. He’s physically disabled and has an awful lot of health issues. I had hoped that his health issues would be a wake-up call and that he would begin to seek God for change. He seems to have mental issues as well. I observe delusional jealousy disorder, psychosis and narcissism. His relationship with our 19 year old son has failed. I have confronted him many times about seeking help and he refuses and has used excuses to not seek counseling. I’ve sought God for answers and I feel led to leave because my staying is perpetuating the situation and enabling him. The atmosphere of our home is cursed with a hostile spirit from all the name-calling, yelling, fault-finding, complaining, accusations and plain angry emotions. Leaving seems more loving for the benefit of us all in order to heal and for correction to take place. He has chipped away at my heart until there is nothing left. It’s sites like this that have provided a place for me to find support and clarity. I am grateful to have found this one. Please pray for our safety and well-being as I will do the same for everyone here who is dealing with unnecessary hurt, heartache and brokenness. This is not God’s will for His daughters.
I need prayers to see my next move in this tired abusive toxic marriage. Becoming a wife is ruined, becoming a mother is ruined. I want out, I still love him and I know he’s hurt from his past family life. I don’t care anymore I’m done being his and his families punching bag. Jesus please help me I’m so tired my baby doesn’t deserve this in her first year of life
Hi, I believe God led me to your prayers through another site as I seek for wisdom and direction from God. I also thought my husband was a Believer before I committed to marrying him, but I also had allowed for much compromise in my Christian life and physical relationship before marrying. (My previous marriage of 12 years (he was a Believer) I had escaped with my life (after trying to salvage my marriage for 3 years, but also failing in the later years). My current spouse seemed like an answer to prayer because He showered so much love and kindness on me. He made all my dreams (or so I thought) come true. The past few years he has deteriorated in so many ways and I found out that he is not a believer and wants nothing to do with Scripture or the Lord or church (although there have been even recent occasions where he has agreed to take me…I often think I am seeing God work, but then something else will take place and he make a complete 180° again to oppose anything that has to do with the Lord.) The emotional and verbal abuse was already there along with false accusations, projections, manipulation etc. and usually involved whenever I wanted to see family or friends…then when I made some new friends that were Christians (men met through work) he immediately judged and accused me of wanting to be with them which was completely untrue. I tried to tell him that they were no different than any other family friend who had brought me encouragement. I even introduced them to him and other family. But it became a point of contention that he would not let go of…He became so angry in his insecurities that he completely rejected me and pushed me away in all aspects. That’s when I ended up an emotional wreck because he already knew what had happened in my previous marriage and he literally repeated it only worse – the only difference was that he wouldn’t hurt me physically. So, being “thrown away” I ended up like the stray dog on the porch looking for food – if the dog gets no food and kicked every time it shows up it’s going to look for food and when there’s someone who shows it kindness to then why would it refuse that?
I was starving for affection and my love language also was words of affirmation so, it didn’t take long for me to find myself exactly what he had falsely accused me of months later….I was devastated with myself, angry (not at God, but the situation) & thought over and over that if my husband hadn’t accused me falsely and thrown me away then I wouldn’t have even considered any of it and I was angry that I was experiencing it – even though I knew better, I just felt so exhausted & weak, like a wilted flower laying on the cobblestone crushed by a heavy foot….and this was the 2nd time I felt that way. But this time it was with the person I thought had rescued me from the last situation. I begged for God to somehow heal my heart and forgive me. I never thought that I would’ve ended up like that, but I have been seeking deliverance and prayer ever since and focusing on healing and my relationship with the Lord. I still wonder if He could or would ever bless the other person I leaned on and came to love and trust, but I thought to myself, how could He when what I am (we are) doing is wrong? So, I find myself crawling toward Jesus, looking up at Him with a dirt-covered, tear-stained face begging to be cleaned, forgiven, & loved again, but wanting clarity on how to move forward after…I know He has the answers, but I am exhausted from waiting – I am grateful to have finally found some godly believers who can pray with me and for me and I can hear the word of God preached. I pray He gives me the clear answer and wisdom I need for my next steps…
You are a beautiful creation of God. You are right to turn your eyes to Jesus. He doesn’t want you to be abused. Maybe it’s time to take next steps for your marriage and if I could recommend a process for healing so you’re less likely to repeat attracting an abusive partner, I highly recommend any of Leslie Vernick’s groups (the emotionally destructive marriage) and Called to Peace Ministries and support groups. Also, the Refuge has support groups and is excellent!
God forgives fully and freely when we repent sincerely. Move forward in that freedom and joy! He doesn’t beat you up like your husband does. Which One (one) will you model? Follow Jesus, He sees s the Truth, the Life and the Way.
You are loved.
I am in a terribly emotionally abusive marriage, I got out of an abusive marriage and unfortunately went right back into an even worse one. He has thrown things at me, punched holes in walls, yelled at me for crying amidst the screaming. He has PTSD from serving but I know that’s not an excuse. I have been very open to my family about what goes on though. His family just criticizes me for seeming upset when I am around them saying I am in “a mood” agian, because I am just emotionally exhausted. I have a supportive family but they live in Wisconsin I currently live in tennessee. I am thinking moving back home and starting over wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Hi Heather, how are you? This sounds HORRIBLE. I’m so sorry you have to deal with this, it’s unfair and I hope God has removed you from this situation. I’m currently with a man who yells at me and belittles me, and he raised an object at me when he was angry but stopped himself from hitting me with it. He can’t control his anger and won’t let me break up with him. I’m scared and alone. Hoping to be free and single soon.
My husband, now 58, and I’m 66 ,has always at times been drunk and abusive, we did speak to a priest about this and the priest suggested to him choose between the drinking or the family, he never turned up for an arranged visit to the priest, so the priest unfortunately dropped contact with him, he has since started 2 years ago on our 27th Anniversary talking to his ” first love on the internet ( she’s from his own country, and also around the same vehemently refused to take me with to his own home abroad ( it was my brother in law’s funeral, already I had found out about his talks on the phone with her,but he assured me deceitfully that he had no intentions of taking with or seeing her…all lies. This came as a big shock for me as through the year’s of marriage I have went through every kind of trauma imaginable but I always thought we were one, in it together so to speak.
I told him to leave, still in shock and deeply hurt I packed his cases and told him to go. He came back asking to give or marriage another chance, as I prayed over it , I sensed he was going through a change of life experience and recapturing his youth with this person who was part of it, and forgave and never brought the subject up.again (. at his request, ) that was a year ago and by chance my daughter saw that person’s number pop up again on the phone naturally once again I was in shock and hurt to the core and almost devastated, but my daughter Grace stood bye and helped me. I told him to leave, he refused blankly and said I would have to put him out first.
He knows he’s comming into a large amount of money, ( we’ve always been hand to mouth sort of people never really short of money with plenty of holidays at times. ( a day at.a time scenario adoption, )I didn’t mention he spoiled every occasion with drink…holiday’s birthday’s Christmas ect I am now a pensioner, AND i don’t think he wants to support me ( this he has threatened many times. ) Also my first marriage was Annulled so I think I put up with this behaviour possibly guilty of the first failure and determined to stay for better or worse. It’s very insecure at my age in life to be left this way. I Guess I have a million more stories, but may be for another day.
Please pray for me and my family who naturally have also suffered through this mockery of a marriage and could I ask all who read this pray for me and my family and husband, that a miraculous healing takes place to save our marriage and for the Holy spirit to guide me to the right decisions of
what God wants me to do..
Hello,
I’m 29, married for almost 5 years (no kids). My husband is very emotionally abusive. My feelings and hurts are never heard. I realize God doesn’t want a life of abuse for me. I’ve prayed so much for change. It seems like every time I pray, the abuse gets worse. I don’t know what God is telling me. To leave or wait? And if I leave, how to disattach myself emotionally? We’ve been separated before and I came right back after 3 months. I think the hardest part is when you are emotionally attached to someone and unsure how to leave because of this “bond ” one has with the abuser. Some advice or prayer would be appreciated…
Hi Diana,
Of course, I will pray for you! I am so very sorry you’ve endured even a single word of emotional abuse. I know how deeply words cut. It makes sense that when you pray, the abuse seems to get worse. The enemy loves taking those opportunities to attack and try to steal your hope and your focus away from the Lord.
I wish I could tell you what to do here, but, unfortunately, this is a decision only you can make. I agree that God doesn’t want a life of abuse for you. And it seems like the pattern of abuse isn’t stopping, so, whether you divorce or separate or not, it sounds like the boundaries need to change to provide more protection for you.
I so relate to your doubts here about how you would ever be able to detach emotionally from this person you’ve given your heart to. It was such a heart-wrenching process for me and I was so tempted to run back to him for months after I’d made my decision (because he remained unwilling to change), but I survived all of my worst days and grew stronger through it. I know it sounds cliche to say it like that, but I don’t think I ever could have built up my strength if I’d stayed in that abusive environment. Getting out hurt so badly, but it also gave me space to reconnect with God and redefine my identity in Him (and not on the hurtful words of my abusive ex-husband).
Your life doesn’t have to be like this. He doesn’t hold all of the cards. You aren’t in control of his words and actions but you ARE in control of how much of them you allow in your life. You are stronger than he’s making you believe you are, Diana. I’m praying for you, dear one.
I can relate to the sadness of breaking the bond…my current spouse is not a believer and has had an indescribable amount of rejection and damage and other trauma from before he was born til now. I worry about not wanting to hurt him or drive him to the point of self harm only because he always talks about wishing he was never born. I pray for his healing and salvation, but feel he is so tied down and bound by so many lies and shackles. I wonder if I left if God would save him or if he would go off the deep end and even though the trust I had in him is shattered, I can’t imagine him going into eternity without Christ. I would be devastated. I pray too, that God brings clarity.
I am currently in the same exact situation. I’ve prayed to God to help me through this, to give me strength, to give me a way out if that is what he wants for my life because I’ve been doing this for 28 years. It got so bad that I started seeing a therapist because my depression, self esteem and self worth was so low. She told me he is narcissistic. I’ve tried to stay with him thinking that is what God would want me to do, then I started thinking God would not want me to continue on this way. My husband keeps telling me he’s going to change but he never does, he does well for a couple of months, sometimes it doesn’t last that long, then it’s back to him yelling at me, telling me I’m not worth much, pointing out everything that is wrong with me. I’m worn down mentally and emotionally, I’m tired and I feel like it’s taking a toll on my health.
Thank you so much for the prayers and sharing what you’ve been through, I’m glad you were able to get out of your situation and I pray God continues to bless you.
Oh Joanna, my heart breaks for what you have endured all of these years. I’m so glad that you’ve reached out for help from a therapist. I know how difficult it is even just to do that part when you are in a situation like that. I can hear your exhaustion and heartache in your words…and you still left encouraging words for me, too! Bless you, dear one. May you feel the fullness of God’s love wash over you today – His peace that passes understanding, His gentleness, His unshakable joy, and His never-ending faithfulness. 💜
Hi Jennifer, your prayers are amazing! I’m in a marriage were the roles are reversed (I’m the husband) dealing with abuse. I don’t know for sure if there has been an affair but I can feel the sting of the other situations you’ve described. I’ve been working to fight for this marriage (25yrs) and starting to stand up to the abuse but my heart is so broken and worn out, it just doesn’t feel like it can make it through. God has been my rock all these year too and doing by best to trust in Him and hoping He can lead my wife to Him as well. I just cried when reading your prayers as I can hear/feel your pain (and my own) as they were such a heart felt cry out to God. I’ve learning to pray like that with just letting my heart cry out and even now feeling my gut clinch/tighten to cry. I’m trying to hope some day my wife could see God the way you do and we could share that experience together. God bless you and your family!
Oh, Jim, I am so very sorry that you are experiencing abuse. That has to be incredibly difficult for you and I’m so proud of you for starting to stand up to it. I know how much strength, courage, and energy that takes! Praying for God to guide your every step and be ever-so-near to you along the way. 💜
We’re your prayers answered
They were. The answers didn’t look exactly like I expected them to, but God has been so faithful in protecting me, providing for me, and guiding my next steps.
Did you end up divorced?
Hi Jennifer, unfortunately, that marriage did end in divorce. I am now happily remarried to a wonderful man, but I also don’t believe marriages like my first always end in divorce. I know women who were in marriages similar to my first who experienced true healing in their marriages as they sought help and counseling. They stayed and reconciled with their spouse. I believe God brings beauty from ashes differently in all of our unique stories.
I am going through the same thing I spent half I’d my life with a man exactly like you described. I lost 25 years and now separated and almost done with divorce. He is still trying to manipulate me and now my fears are that he will find a way to leave me where I can’t even exist financially. I can’t work I have severe back and neck chronic pain, so it would be virtually impossible to hold down a job I used to work I was a dental assistant for 16 years and that tore up my spine, so I had to retire in 2015. I wish I had left when I was still able to work but I didn’t I kept trying I did everything I could do like you and still the words, yelling, raging, insults temper tantrums went on and on. I am struggling with nightmares still from the past with him. My biggest fear is not getting enough alimony/support to support my daughter and myself. She is grown 22 but still is at home and working. Like you I went into this thinking it was going to be a good marriage and like you it took me years to figure out what was happening and make sense of it all. I have horror stories for days I could talk about with the things he has inflicted on me and my kids. Your story hit home with me and I am praying I can get through this and move on and make it on my own I’m glad you found a man that truly loves you and treats you with love and respect!
Oh Sherry, my heart just breaks with yours that you had to experience any of that. I am so very sorry for the abuse you’ve endured. Your comment mentioned fears you still wrestle with multiple times, so I’m going to pray specifically that God would cast out those fears with His truth, give you a peace that passes all understanding, and give you confidence and hope that God will provide and make a way in this incredibly difficult situation. Thank you for sharing pieces of your story with me. May God bring beauty from the ashes in your past and a rock solid hope for your future. 💜
Just need prayer. Lots of prayer. My husband’s verbal abuse is so off the charts. I pray for him all the time, but he refuses any help. He can be nice and say he loves me and will be good to me emotionally, but that doesn’t last long. He has always had a chip on his shoulder. I never know when an innocent remark will cause the verbal onslaught. Then the threats, name calling, then the punishing me by not talking or eating with me for days. I feel I’m married to a teenage boy. He can have sex with me and in less than 24 hours he is name calling me. Telling me to get out he can’t stand me. Our marriage is hurting, I’m hurting and so is he. I’m not sure if he has a mental illness or demonic oppression or this is just deep seated hurt. I’ve prayed for him almost daily. I love my husband, but this is abuse. Not the way marriage should be. I don’t feel emotionally safe and haven’t for many years now. He promises to stop, but he can’t seem to stop. It’s his drug of choice verbal and emotional abuse. The verbal cruelty is beyond the limits of a couple who had an argument. He goes to far he try’s to destroy me in every way. Even comparing me to other women. I’m drowning in hurt.